My day as an almost hero...

So yesterday began as any ordinary day, chaos. I was running late, I got turned around, things weren't cooperating. So I was meeting up with Andee to find something special for my almost brother-law, Bruce, for his birthday. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Joliet, on the west side of Larking there used to be a Christian book store( who knows how long ago they closed, but they did), so I was turning around to go east on Jefferson to the Family Christian Book Store, when I did a man started waving at me. If you are unfamiliar with this part of town it's a tad shady. I did not respond the first time but he kept waving at me and saying I accessed he was far enough away from the car it was safe to unroll the window so I could hear him. He says " There is a woman on the ground around the corner..." and by this statement he walks away. I look to where he has pointed and I am unsure as to "pile on the ground" if it is actually a person. I pull my van to the side of the road, and identify that it is a person who is laying crumbled in a pile in the middle of the day off a busy street. I dial 911, and roll up my windows and lock my doors ( as Jenna and Jackson are inside(and who knows what is about to unfold)) I shove my keys down the front of my pants, hey no one was going to steal my van with my 2 children inside it without a fight. I approach the person that I can clearly identify as a woman. I am talking to the 911 dispatcher who I think was amazed that I knew what I was doing (kind of you, I mean you train for these things but you hardly think that you may have to use them, in the back of my head I was locating my respirator which I carry to help preform safe CPR). I do locate a pulse and the woman starts talking saying thank you sister. At this point I tell the dispatcher that I believe the woman is intoxicated, that's right I could small it from ten city blocks away as soon as she open her mouthed. I asked her name, and asked if she knew where she was. She correctly stated both. Here is the kicker, she then tells me she is an officer! That's right ladies and gentleman and officer. I won't blog this ladies name, but I will always remember it. When the ambulance arrives, they say "Julie( that's what I'll call her) you missed court this morning", I was in shock and stumbled off something about my 2 kids in my car and asked politely was there anything else they needed the EMT ( I assume ) shook his head no. I was back in my van and off to the book store.
I have to ask would you have been the man who passed the lady on as someone else's problem or would you have been the person whose only thoughts we to her children and this women? Sorry to be so quizzical but I can hardly believe this man who walked away from someone who he saw unconscious on the side of the road!

Missing some things...

So I have been busy the last couple weeks, ok super busy and really since I no longer work full-time, I am still super busy, just with other things. But I realized I have totally neglected some things, my yoga time and church. Neither intentionally but...I have not done my yoga in a week! My back totally feels a difference...and so does my spirit so this mornings blog will be short but sweet. No matter how busy we get we need to remeber to do the things that make us feel good! So I am off to livingroom yoga and some time reading my devotional.

Your kids are so cute, if I had a gun I'd kidnap them!

So explanation, I was at a grocery store in IN getting some last minute stuff, and this lady comes up to me in the parking lot commenting on how cute Jackson was, and then she sees Jenna and gushes on how gorgeous she is. I love when people compliment my children and all, however she follows her gush by saying "Your kids are so cute, if I had a gun I'd kidnap them", and I actually think she said a gun with her, which is even scarier. People really need to think before they speak.
Did she not think "wow that lady is going to think I am a nut bag!"?
I think that often times as a culture ( I am now referring to those of us who blog and update our status on Facebook, Twitter, or MySpace), that we often don't think of the way our "status" or words affect they way people look at us. I shared an in depth conversation with Andee ( one of my closest friends and steerting team members for our MOPS chapter), about another mother( I know gosip is bad, we were giving in to temptation) . We were however concerned that this mommies's words could affect the way people look at us.
I never want any of my friends or family to ever worry about this so I m adding to my "Chore Chart"
6. To edit myself( ok this may be hard for me becuase I like to share when I am upset) to make sure when I read my words that not only do the words represent me well, but also words that would make those who are my friends and family proud of me.


To the lady at the Strak and VonTill gorcery store please think about what you say before you say it, would your family want to brag that you are their sister, mother, cousin, wife, ect, with words like "Your kids are so cute, if I had a gun with me I'd kidnap them."

And the Winner for Catchy Blog Title is ....

Alright I won't ruin the surprise I will tell you further down. Plus you must know wonder why you were not invited to participate in the contest and who came up with the title "Your kids are so cute, if I had a gun I'd kidnap them!"(Alright, that is the winner explanation still necessary...)
My family and some friends went camping this weekend ( me and the children were gone Wednesday until today, hence the missing days on my bog) . My husband is a great guy very outdoorsy and manly and I LOVE him, but he and I don't get each other. The fact is I like reality TV shows, I love to blog, read others blogs, run social events or organize functions. He hates reality TV ( unless it has to do with knives, guns, trucks, or blowing things up( I do realize while typing this he sounds like a redneck fool(he isn't)), I don't think he really even knows what a blog is, and he is not anti social but he will not go out of his way to say hi to anyone. Anyways( I am sure by this point you may indeed think I may be including to much back story). He jokingly made reference to the fact that I may have had a blogging withdrawal. It may have been in fact true, but I am too tired to argue and really I just needed to put down concretely the next title to my next official blog, the one I will type when I don't have 5 days of laundry waiting for me, have taken a shower, finished unpacking the van and truck. Now I know you must still want an explanation for the title that will come soon.....

The beginning and end of chaos....

So yesterday my baby girl had her very first birthday party! The party throwing, planning and executing were all every time consuming and stressing. However, this is now over and an new adventure awaits us! That's right because we are having another celebration on her physical birthday tomorrow, it's not to much just a couple friends and their kids. But I have an interview first thing in the morning and then after the celebration I need to head back home and pack up clothes for a romantic evening with my husband, to which he is oblivious to ( it is our 8 year wedding anniversary and last year well you can imagine how we spent our day and the year before I was the Matron of Honor in a wedding in Minnesota( so I was getting my hair done, attending to my bride's every need, sitting at her head table and stressing about the fact that I had spent 3 days away from my little boy who I had never left longer than 12 hours!)). So I am surprising him with a night alone in a hotel with a spa and pool....
However, the next morning I have a MOPS meeting at 9:30 when I am done, (which I am responsible for the craft and food!) I will rush back home if I have forgotten something ( I am sure I will have) before I leave for Indiana to spend Wednesday night with my best friend and get up the next morning to go reserve 3 sites for camping for the next 4 days!
So as you can imagine today was just the beginning....

Chore Charts ATLAST!

I know you are like" Jama, have you lost your mind". This morning I had an epiphany as I was driving to the laundry mat, there are so many things that I forget to do on a daily basis. I am not talking about the usual things that are on a chore chart, and not the kind of items that are rewarded with a sticker. The premise of a chore chart is to teach us to do the things that need to be done daily/weekly, i.e. vacuuming, picking up your room, taking out the trash. The funny thing is this should be things we do automatically. I was thinking though there should be a whole mess of things I do automatically that I forget all the time. I need to exercises daily, I need to read to my child, I need to snuggle with my husband, ok you are thinking again, and this time you are thinking "Jama, now no one should have to remind you of these things." No, they really shouldn't have to. Since I have decided to put my family and personal spirituality at the forefront of my life I need a new "Chore Chart", not just to do the little things that sometimes get swept by the wayside but to do somethings that will prepare me to be in a place where I no longer have to look down and make sure I am putting one foot in front of the other on the right path. So here goes a sneak peak at my list, feel free to steal my idea of a chore chart for life( or any of my "chores").

1. Wake up before the children(okay I do realize this will not always happen) spend sometime on my yoga, and bs study

2. Pray OUT LOUD daily ( this is to myself, OUT LOUD so that I can practice being comfortable with the fact that others may hear me(I am often called on to pray at MOPS or in our leadership meetings)

3. Touch my husband at least 5 times( ok and for me I have to do the touching(we are not speaking sexually either)I have to touch him lovingly at least 5 times a day, kissing, hugging, hand holding, letting him know that he is my thoughts throughout the day.

4. Read with my children, Jackson never used to sit still and let me read to him and now he can't get enough and I love every moment, but sometimes I am in such a rush to get him to bed because I had a rough day.

5. Call my family, sometimes I can go almost a week without talking to them and life is just to short, even if it is just to day" hi "I am going to call.

Lost and God

So I am not sure if anyone else follows the TV show Lost but I have watched every episode. I was watching my DVRed episode( yeah that's right the DVR again, I watch nothing live) and I was UPSET. I use bold letters here because I think I may have caught something that bother me immensely. The island's God or whatever he is, name is Jacob, and the show flashes to points in each of the cast ways lives that he has been there for them ( they of course they are oblivious to it). There is a particular character Ben(who is not a cast away originally he is with the Dharma Initiative( a bunch of researchers and such that come to the island in the 70's), and then joins the people who are native to the island)(felt I needed to fill you in if you do not follow the show) has followed this Jacob even though he has never seen him, and his daughter dies, he is banned from the one place he calls home,basically his life is turned upside down. This other character who is supposedly(really he is an enemy of Jacob's falsely posing as this character) the new leader on the island, which used to be this character Ben's job, has convinced Ben that he must kill Jacob. He uses the logic that he has suffered and followed this man in good faith and still Jacob has chosen someone else to lead the people, and before Ben does attack Jacob he asked "why not me?" I was so overwhelmed by the simple fact on how much this plays with real life! I sometimes am Ben, I follow God ( the best that I think I can ( Ben had this problem too, and ill things happened because he actions weren't made for the right reasons) and crappy stuff happens. The difference between Ben and I is that when I do meet God I will stretch out my arms and tell him thank you, because the good and bad things in my life make me who I am. This TV series reminded me though I follow blindly this man I have never met he is there for me in life at moments I need him.

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with the LORD.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.

He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.

He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he
questioned the LORD about it:

"LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."

The LORD replied:

"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

written by Carolyn Joyce Carty

From tutus to prom dresses, and TV shows oh my!

So yesterday I took Jenna to get her pictures taken for her first birthday, and I think maybe I am still in shock. This year has just flown by and I think faster than the 2 years before when Jackson was littler. I think the reality that this is the last time that I will hold a a baby that is mine is here. I would love to have another one but things financially will never be there ( unless I hurry up and finish my degree, but as many of you know I want to put my children first and I feel that would take lots of my time from them). Jenna is no longer breastfeeding she self weaned when I started her on the bottle more often. I am having a little withdrawal from breastfeeding. I miss the closeness, I remember this with Jackson, too. She will take her bottle and crawl away not let me hold her.
Then I was watching a program I had on the DVR about a girl's first prom and how it is almost an out of body moment for the parents, who are in disbelief that their baby girl is now 16 which is almost 18 which is almost 21 which is almost 30....."one day the thing that makes them happy is tutus and tiaras and the next thing they are picking out prom dresses". I don't if I am feeling this way because my own birthday is around the corner, or it has just set it that today is almost tommorrow, but I am glad that I get to live every moment of it.

You what???

As I find myself getting older by the passing day ( I am not referring to my age but a state of mind by the way so no cracks on how soon I will be 30) I find that I enjoy different things. I am reminded of this in abundance when my Brother-in-law ( who is 19) says things like "Dude you woke me up..." and I say things like "It was 11am Bryan". I remember the days where my husband and I slept till the afternoon sun beat down until our tummies growled in frustration. These days I am lucky if I sleep until 8 o'clock. but the age thing doesn't come into place there. The fact is I try and get up before the kids I enjoy the peace and quite that happens in the house after Justin has slinked off to work the children both are snuggled in their warm beds. I spend some time reading my morning devotional, and maybe if I get done before the kids get I stick in my Pilates or Yoga DVD. So I guess what I refer to as older maybe termed wiser or settled. I like this me I like that these little things help start my day in a serene way( which eventually turn into chaos after I am still a mother of a 3 year old boy and nearly 1year old baby girl!)

So the basics...

So I have been terribly busy these past months trying not to let the doors on the place I considered my 3rd home( 2nd being my in-laws). The 3rd, my church Streams of Hope, did have it's last service April 26th, 2009. This was a really sad day for me to say the least. The shocking thing to some of you is that I was in complete denial I thought I and a small group of others could single handled save something that god had other plans for. I have been hard at work trying to Charter a MOPS ( Moms of Preschoolers( a faith based support network)) group and have made some extremely close bonds with women who hold the same values I do. I started and stopped a full time job. And all this time I have been me I have not lost any part of me, at least not the me I want to be. So today and everyday I have to remind myself back to the basics Jama...God, family,friends, health, and happiness, and in reality they all go back to number one on that list.


P.S. I originally wanted to begin this blogging journey talking about a page on my trek to find others mother's like me out in cyberspace. I ran across a 36 year old mother and wife who had a sexual reference on her public page, I wondered if she realized how that made her look, and then I realized that I have done and said and shown pretty ugly and stupid sides of myself to the public at one time or another and someone still reached out and showed me Christ ( through good works or actions). So to this- an invite to our group and yes now I definitely hope she attends( even if it makes me delete this section of my blog).